…it’s off to work I go. After over three weeks off, due to illness and Christmas, I head back to work today. L and I get up early together, as she is back as a day patient today. She eats breakfast reasonably cheerfully, although we are both fairly robotic. K comes and joins us. We both ask her why on earth she is up at that time, but it is lovely to see her. A taxi arrives to take L to the unit – this is a feature of the day patient programme. I try to suppress the guilt about NHS resources being spent in this way, but it is part of the day programme service.
Work is ok, I try to remember what the priorities were before I was off. There are the obligatory mountain of emails, catching up with colleagues and answering queries. Many close colleagues ask how L has been over Christmas. I tell of her weight loss and constant controlling. I’m more cheerful when I describe her NYE drunkenness. But I have a sense of life getting back to normal, of balancing work and life and generally failing. I am due in London two or three nights next week and I will have to really firm with C and L’s father about the need for close supervision of snacks and meals. Life cannot stop for anorexia completely, we have to fit life around it and anorexia around life.