The Anorexic, Her Boyfriend, his Mother and her Mother

Readmission looms. In a week when we are supposed to step things up, L loses weight. The problem is her absence, at college, at work and at The Boyfriend’s house. At home, we make her eat. We can’t stop her going to work (yet) or to college (yet) or going to The Boyfriend’s (yet). I extract The Boyfriend’s Mother’s number from her. By, y’know, threatening to go round there, but whatever it takes. I text her telling her the situation. She phones me almost immediately.

I am still floored by Ed’s imperative to make her lie. She tells me what she eats at The Boyfriends house; it turns out she never touches carbohydrates. She tells me she and TBM have had a lovely chat about it; they’ve never discussed it. TBM talks about how lovely L is, about how many times she has been worried by her insistence on eating salads and how worried The Boyfriend is. He sees her getting so thin and her anxiety at eating and his heart aches for her. This is their first love and it is so perfect, but so sad too. We agree to meet and it feels as if we are plotting against the conspiracies and secrecies of Ed, drawing him out of the shadows and pulling L into the light,

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5 responses to “The Anorexic, Her Boyfriend, his Mother and her Mother

  1. Oh dear, it is so very sad. Surely L must have known that the truth would emerge. I know it is Ed that drives her, rules her. But she is a clever young woman and must understand how much she will miss out on as an inpatient again. I wish her the strength to fight this vicious condition and escape readmission. Your heart must be so heavy at the prospect of her being away from home again. There seems though to be an increasing sense of inevitability. Stay strong and know that you have done everything you possibly can to help L gain weight at home. Short of force feeding I can’t see any option unexplored. Will be thinking of you, and your family, in the days ahead. Lots of love xx

  2. I’m a bit of a lurker, but just wanted to say that I’m reading along, and I think you’re a brilliant mum, to both your girls. x

  3. I hope you are all okay. It’s a horrid, horrid illness that damages all who are touched by it. I hope you all stay strong & get the L you love back soon.

  4. Maybe she simply needs to go inpatient and it would be a good thing. I know it’s a complete upheaval and there are some awful, horrible sides to it but if she’s just going downhill then it’s the best option. Could they keep her until BMI 20 or a healthier weight this time as that might give her a better chance of recovery? The help you give her is phenomenal so dont feel guilty or anything… I hope it works out for you all

  5. Just want to offer my support and love again. Please be in touch – I have misplaced your contact details, but would really like you to email me. x

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