This is my account of life with my teenage daughter who is trying to recover from anorexia, her twin sister who struggles with OCD and anxiety and my own experience of depression. I am no expert and all I know is what I feel and think. I really welcome your views, whether you agree, disagree or want to share something that helped you either as a carer or someone with mental health issues. My son also features here, as a young man with Aspergers Syndrome making his way in a world that is terrified of difference and non conformity. I sometimes write about feminism especially some of the things I would find hard to write more openly. Or anything else that occurs to me..


14 responses to “About

  1. Just wanted you to know that this is one of the best ED related blogs I have ever seen and I have passed it onto a couple of others who’s exact words were “It’s bloody brilliant”…

    This is what people in recovery and other carers and parents need to read. Sounds like you are doing an amazing job.

  2. You really do inspire me, you’re an amazing woman and you’re doing an amazing job caring for your daughter. Your determination, love and strengh is truely admirable. Keep strong, I know you and your family will get throught this.

  3. Your daughter is so blessed to have your unwavering support. That is such a strong influence in recovery. As a former anorexic (I still struggle, but I’ve maintained a normal weight for 5 years) I am so impressed by both your courage and especially L’s. This may be the hardest thing she’s ever done, but it is also the best. Keep fighting, keep hoping, freedom is worth it! My prayers are with you.

  4. Hi there,
    I found your blog a few days ago, and read it all in one day. I just wanted to say what an incredible mother you are, and how strong your daughter is. I suffered through anorexia and bulimia for 8 years, from when i was 11 to 19. I am proud to say I am recovered now, at university, and living with my amazing, supportive partner. 8 years is a long time to have an ED, and i definitely would have recovered sooner if I had the support of my parents. Instead they denied it was a problem or got angry and yelled and cried. With the support L has from all your family I’m sure she will recover in no time and go on to lead a full, rewarding life. My thoughts are with you all!

  5. Hi, I somehow stumbled upon your blog this morning and have now read the entire thing. There were times when I have wanted to cry for the similarity of your life with how my own used to be. My mother dealt with my anorexia from the age of 14 until I moved out at age 19, and into a long term residential facility. Today I live independently but still struggle every day with the demon of anorexia. I cannot express how much the strength and support of my own mother has helped me to fight, and continue to do so. Even in my most bleak times, when my voice was almost consumed completely by anorexias, my mother was there with her unwavering support. She knew what was best for me, and stuck by me in her gentle way, even when I could not see the light and could not understand anything besides resisting food. Your blog has made me even more aware of the exhaustion and depression she feels, and it is a credit to her incredible soul, and yours too, that she still stays by me. I don’t know really what I wanted to express in this reply, but I just want you to know that it does get better, it does get easier, your relationship with your daughter will always be powerful, and even when things get tough and your daughter seems to have disappeared, she is still there admiring your strength.
    I wish you the best of luck, I don’t think anyone really knows how to defeat this illness perfectly, but I think what your are doing now is as close as it gets.

  6. Today, on international women’s day, I am wishing you and L love, strength and good days to come in the year ahead. You are both wonderful women x

  7. hope all is well. However, I have some questions. How did you realise that something was wrong with L? Did the school ring you? Did she just stop eating? How did you get her to go to the doctor? Did you force her? Did she chose to go?

    • Hi, she told me she made herself sick. I took her to the doctors who warned her about this behaviour and told her not to lose anymore weight. She continued to lose and we went back. She knew she was out of control, but she also didn’t really believe it was anything wrong.

      Are you in the same place?

      • I starve myself and I self harm. My school realised and rang my mum, however, she didn’t believe them and so she didn’t take me to the doctors so I still carry on because, like L, I don’t think there’s anything seriously wrong with me. I suppose I should tell her but I don’t know how and I don’t want to make a fuss or worry her.

  8. My daughter is 27 and has been consciously in recovery for the past 3 years. It is not a straight line — but in our speaking up, in our writing it out, we do create order in the chaos. Blessings.

  9. I recovered what I feel is completely from an eating disorder 18 years ago. I would take turns starving myself and then binge eat because of the days of starvation. This all began with feelings of isolation and an environment of intense competition when I was in college. Today I maintain a healthy weight without this destructive practice. If you’d like to hear how I recovered, please post your email. (Since it is a rather long story.)

  10. Dear OneMoreMum, I just found your blog whilst googling for my own (anorexiamummy.blogspot.com) which thankfully I have not written now for some years as my darling teen is now well and recovered, but from the few posts of yours I have read so far, you express beautifully and heartbreakingly what I went through. I want you to know that there is hope. Keep fighting. I will reply more carefully when I have read your whole blog. Please do email me if you would like, particularly if you are in London,


  11. Hi … just want to say that my heart goes out to you … I have been on a similar journey (I experience depression, I have a teenage daughter with an eating disorder that required 8 months hospitalisation, and a son with severe mental health issues (undiagnosed because he doesn’t want help and as an ‘adult’ nobody can make him engage with MHS).

    Thank you for writing so openly and honestly, and more importantly for sharing it all publicly. It is such a lonely place to be – but there is some comfort (at least for me) in knowing that I am not the only one and that there is understanding ‘out there’.

    Thinking of you.

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